Kirt R. Saville
Kirt R. Saville

What Goes Around Comes Around: The Universal Law of Service and Kindness

We often hear the saying, “What goes around comes around.” It’s a simple phrase, yet it encapsulates a profound principle about life, service, and human connection. While planning to serve others is commendable, there’s a deeper, more impactful way to live a life of service, one that echoes the teachings and example of influential figures and everyday wisdom. This principle is beautifully illustrated through personal stories and timeless teachings, highlighting that the good we send into the world has a remarkable way of returning to us, often when we least expect it.

My understanding of this concept began with my parents, particularly my father. Growing up, I witnessed firsthand what it meant to live a life guided by the principle of helping others, regardless of the inconvenience. It was only later, as I matured, that I truly appreciated the rare and invaluable gift I had been given. Not all parents instill such values, but I was fortunate to be raised in a home filled with love, encouragement, and a quiet, consistent example of Christian living, even if church attendance wasn’t frequent. My father, in particular, embodied a profound sense of responsibility towards his fellow human beings.

I vividly recall a family trip to Bear Lake, a place of anticipated weekend fun filled with swimming and water skiing. Our route took us through Evanston, Wyoming. About twenty miles outside of Evanston, on a divided highway, my father spotted a man on the opposite side desperately trying to flag down cars. My father’s inherent nature wouldn’t allow him to simply drive by someone in need. He drove miles to find a turnaround, crossed back, and reached the stranded motorist. The man had run out of gas. My father drove him to Evanston, helped him get fuel, and then returned him to his car, adding significant time to our journey.

As an impatient teenager eager for vacation, I was incredibly annoyed by this delay. Once we were finally back on the road, I questioned my dad about his decision to go so far out of his way. I argued that surely someone else would have stopped to help.

His response was simple and direct: “What goes around comes around.” Seeing my confusion, he elaborated, “I believe that someday, you or I might be the ones needing help on the side of the road, and someone will return the favor.”

Ever the skeptical youth, I retorted, “I seriously doubt it.”

Today, reflecting on that moment and countless others, I understand the depth of his simple wisdom. My talk today, “Living a Life of Service and Love: What Goes Around Comes Around,” explores this very principle.

This concept resonates across cultures and time, appearing in various forms. Think of the Boy Scout motto, “Do a good turn daily.” Consider “paying it back” or the Golden Rule, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” The phrase “You reap what you sow” also speaks to this universal law of reciprocity.

While these are all valuable principles, my father lived by the powerful mantra, “What goes around comes around.” He was always ready to assist anyone, anytime, anywhere, without hesitation or expectation of direct reward.

However, it’s also true that we sometimes hear the cynical phrase, “No good deed goes unpunished.” In today’s world, we are often bombarded with news showcasing the harsh realities where innocent individuals and those striving to do good seem to suffer unjustly. This can make it challenging to fully embrace the optimistic view of “what goes around comes around.”

Service Given, Service Received: A Personal Experience

For years, while admiring my father’s unwavering commitment to his mantra, I remained somewhat skeptical about its tangible reality. I often wondered if “what goes around comes around” was truly more than just a nice idea. It wasn’t until a memorable trip to Flaming Gorge Reservoir that I personally witnessed this principle in action. The clarity of that experience cemented my belief in the power of reciprocal kindness. I remember the trip vividly because it started on Friday the thirteenth. As the only child still living at home, I was excited for a weekend getaway with my parents, fishing at our beloved Flaming Gorge.

This event occurred during my high school years – a time, according to my children, practically prehistoric.

We owned a small cabin cruiser, about fourteen to fifteen feet long, just big enough for the three of us. We launched our boat at Sheep Creek Marina, aiming to travel as far north as possible, spend the weekend aboard, and fish to our heart’s content.

Humorously, we acknowledged the date, Friday the thirteenth, but the events that unfolded that weekend etched that date into my memory for a reason far beyond superstition.

On Friday, heading towards the Wyoming side of the reservoir, we traveled a considerable distance before dropping our lines. Fishing was slow, but we enjoyed being together on the boat in the stunning scenery.

Suddenly, my father pointed to the distant shore, “Look, there’s a man on the far shore waving at us.”

I strained my eyes and could barely make out a figure. Nevertheless, we knew it was time to investigate. We started the motor and steered towards the far bank. The man continued waving, and as we approached, he gestured for us to follow him around a bend into a small, hidden cove. Rounding the corner, I was astonished to see a large, luxurious yacht beached on the shore, dwarfing our little boat in size.

The man profusely thanked us for responding to his signal. His yacht’s battery was dead, and he hoped we could assist. We gladly helped, and soon the powerful engine of his yacht roared back to life. The man and his family were incredibly grateful. We had lost some fishing time, but soon we were back on the reservoir, enjoying the day.

The next day, fishing remained poor. Deciding to head back to the marina, we were about two miles away when we encountered a strong headwind that significantly slowed our progress. Waves began to build, and then, our engine sputtered and died. We tried everything to restart it, but it was no use. My dad, a skilled DIY enthusiast who could usually fix anything, was stumped.

While we were struggling with the outboard motor, to our utter surprise, the yacht from the previous day approached us. The man called out, asking if we needed help. I had never been so relieved to see someone! Flaming Gorge is vast, and after two days on the water, the chances of encountering the same person again seemed slim. He offered to tow us back to the marina, still a considerable distance away. We gratefully accepted his kind offer.

We were making good progress, being towed smoothly behind the massive yacht. We could even see the marina in the distance when, unbelievably, the yacht’s engine also died. They checked fuel lines, filters – everything – but the engine wouldn’t start. Friday the thirteenth weekend luck, indeed! Even their small trolling motor refused to cooperate.

Meanwhile, the wind intensified into a gale, pushing us further away from the marina. I could barely see it anymore as my dad and “Mr. Yacht Guy” worked on the engines. Three motors, and none would start. Incredible!

Then, seemingly out of nowhere, a small, open aluminum fishing boat, piloted by an elderly man and his wife, puttered towards us. I was taken aback to see his wife, perfectly made up with pancake makeup, despite the wind and waves.

I wondered, “What are these two doing out here in this tiny boat in such rough conditions?”

The old gentleman offered to tow us. Frankly, I was skeptical. He attached a line to the massive yacht, and with his little twenty-five horsepower outboard motor, he chugged away like a tugboat pulling a battleship. Soon, the yacht and the small boat disappeared into the distance, heading towards the marina.

We were still adrift, being blown further off course. About forty-five minutes later, the little old man and his wife returned, tossed us a line, and began towing us back to the dock. I was amazed by their willingness to go to such lengths to help complete strangers. Their kindness and dedication were a gift I will never forget.

By this point, we had become fast friends, bonded by the day’s extraordinary events. We helped the yacht owner load his boat onto its trailer, and then assisted the elderly couple with their small aluminum boat. As fate would have it, the old gentleman had left his car lights on, and his battery was dead. My dad pulled out his jumper cables and got their car running. We all worked together to secure both boats onto their trailers.

We laughed all the way home, recounting the weekend’s unbelievable adventures. “What goes around really does come around,” I thought. I had finally witnessed my father’s mantra in action. It may have taken me a while, but this was a life lesson I couldn’t ignore.

Thank you, Dad, for being such a powerful example.

What Is Service? Beyond Planned Acts

In 2013, President Dieter F. Uchtdorf eloquently stated, “A favorite saying of mine often attributed to St. Francis of Assisi reads, ‘Preach the gospel at all times and if necessary, use words.’ Implicit in this saying is the understanding that often the most powerful sermons are unspoken.”

I am profoundly grateful for the unspoken lessons my parents taught me. When I faltered in my actions, I often tried to charm my way out of accountability with an abundance of youthful charisma.

My father would simply shake his head and say, “Son, your actions are speaking so loud I can’t hear a word you’re saying.”

For him, actions consistently outweighed words. His life exemplified Christian principles and taught me invaluable lessons about service:

  • Service should be given with genuine joy and without expecting anything in return. The act of giving itself is the reward.
  • Opportunities to serve are often missed because we are not looking for them. We must cultivate awareness and empathy to see the needs around us.
  • Service is rarely convenient. It often requires us to step outside our comfort zones and adjust our plans.
  • Service frequently occurs when we are focused on other tasks. These spontaneous acts of kindness can be the most meaningful.
  • Service, in some form, will eventually come back around. The universe has a way of balancing kindness and compassion.

The Power of Interruptions: Lessons from Christ

These principles are insightful, but I want to emphasize one in particular: service often happens when we are on our way to do something else.

While planned service and charitable endeavors are excellent, the Savior Jesus Christ taught and modeled a more spontaneous, responsive form of service. He frequently blessed others when He was en route to fulfill other purposes.

Consider the parable of the Good Samaritan. Wasn’t the Samaritan on his own journey, which he willingly interrupted to assist a stranger in dire need? In contrast, the Levite and the priest chose to ignore the injured man, passing by on the other side of the road, prioritizing their own schedules and agendas.

Another example, found in Mark 10, describes Jesus teaching about marriage. His teaching was interrupted by people bringing young children to Him for a blessing. The disciples, wanting Jesus to return to what they deemed more important, rebuked those bringing the children. However, Mark’s Gospel records Jesus’ reaction:

“But when Jesus saw it, he was much displeased, and said unto them, Suffer the little children to come unto me, and forbid them not: for of such is the kingdom of God.”

This interruption transformed into a powerful teaching moment, highlighting the importance of children in God’s kingdom and Jesus’ boundless compassion.

In Matthew 9, we read of a day filled with remarkable events in Christ’s ministry. While teaching his disciples, Jesus was interrupted again.

“While he spake these things unto them, behold, there came a certain ruler, and worshipped him, saying, My daughter is even now dead: but come and lay thy hand upon her, and she shall live. And Jesus arose, and followed him, and so did his disciples.”

On his way to the ruler’s house, Jesus was touched by a woman suffering from a debilitating illness. He stopped, inquired who had touched Him, and then healed her.

Continuing his journey to the ruler’s home, Jesus arrived to find mourning and disbelief. He declared that the daughter was not dead but sleeping, a statement met with scorn. Yet, Jesus proceeded to raise the ruler’s daughter from death.

Verse 27 continues, “And when Jesus departed thence, two blind men followed him, crying, and saying, Thou Son of David, have mercy on us.”

Verse 28 states, “And when he was come into the house, the blind men” persisted in their plea. Jesus, moved by their faith, healed them.

Next, “as they went out, behold, they brought to him a dumb man possessed with a devil.” The man was healed, and he spoke again.

Christ was repeatedly interrupted while engaged in his own intended tasks. Yet, he remained receptive to those others overlooked. He willingly paused his plans and blessed those who needed his loving touch. These “interruptions” were not deviations from his mission; they were integral to it.

The Law of Restoration: Reaping What You Sow

“Do a good turn daily. Pay it back. You reap what you sow. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. What goes around comes around.”

These principles of reciprocity are mirrored in ancient teachings. Alma, in the Book of Mormon, instructed his son Corianton on the meaning of “restoration.” Corianton mistakenly believed that wrong actions could be simply erased by later good deeds. Alma clarified:

“Therefore, my son, see that you are merciful unto thy brethren; deal justly, judge righteously, and do good continually; and if ye do all these things then shall ye receive your reward; yea, ye shall have mercy restored unto you again; ye shall have justice restored unto you again; ye shall have a righteous judgment restored unto you again; and ye shall have good rewarded unto you again.

For that which ye do send out shall return unto you again, and be restored; therefore, the word restoration more fully condemneth the sinner, and justifieth him not at all.”

My father taught me, as Alma taught his son, that the life you live will, in essence, be reflected back to you. Mercy begets mercy, righteous judgment invites righteous judgment, and consistent goodness yields good in return. Justice given is justice received.

In simpler terms: if you desire friendship, be a friend. If you seek mercy, show mercy. If you long for forgiveness, forgive others. If you want kindness, be kind. If you desire respect, respect others.

We are all imperfect beings, each with our own flaws, insecurities, and shortcomings. However, I have learned that one powerful way to overcome these challenges is to share our strengths and attributes with others. I testify that these acts of giving will, in some way, return to you, enriching your life in unexpected ways. With each act of service, your own capacity for good grows stronger.

Will there be challenges along the way? Absolutely. Will the return of good deeds always be immediate? Likely not. But, in some way, at some time, these acts of kindness tend to circle back, often in greater measure than what was initially given. Ancient scriptures assure us that obedience to divine law brings blessings.

Do not lose heart when life seems unfair or when good deeds appear to go unnoticed or unrewarded. There is hope and a promise that a life of goodness is its own reward. I find profound comfort in a powerful scripture which states that blessings are predicated upon laws, irrevocably decreed.

“There is a law, irrevocably decreed in heaven before the foundations of this world, upon which all blessings are predicated— And when we obtain any blessing from God, it is by obedience to that law upon which it is predicated.”

Do a good turn daily. Pay it back. You reap what you sow. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. “For that which ye do send out shall return unto you again, and be restored.” What goes around comes around.

How can we apply this principle to our daily lives?

While we might not all have the opportunity to jump-start a yacht in a secluded cove, we can offer a smile and a greeting to someone we pass each day who seems burdened. A simple smile can shift someone’s entire outlook.

We may not be able to provide emergency fuel on a highway, but many of us are running on emotional fumes. We can offer words of encouragement and support to those struggling, acknowledging their efforts and building their confidence.

Becoming a Bucket Filler: The Power of Small Acts

Many years ago, my wife used a memorable object lesson during a family night. With two buckets, one full of water and one empty, she gave each of us an empty cup. She demonstrated how easily unkind words could deplete a full bucket, symbolically removing water with each negative comment. Then, she gave us the opportunity to “fill each other’s buckets” by saying kind things. With each compliment, she added water to both the giver’s and receiver’s cups. This visual activity beautifully illustrated how easily we can diminish others or, conversely, how simple acts of kindness can uplift and enrich everyone involved. The act of filling someone else’s bucket inevitably fills our own.

President Gordon B. Hinckley wisely observed:

“I have discovered that life is not a series of great heroic acts. Life at its best is a matter of consistent goodness and decency, doing without fanfare that which needed to be done when it needed to be done. I have observed that it is not the geniuses that make the difference in this world. I have observed that the work of the world is done largely by men and women of ordinary talent who have worked in an extraordinary manner.”

Leadership expert John C. Maxwell succinctly stated, “Doing the right thing daily compounds over time.”

Our family has always cherished the classic Christmas film It’s a Wonderful Life. The story of George Bailey, who sacrifices his personal dreams for the well-being of his community, beautifully exemplifies the long-term impact of a life lived in service. The film poignantly illustrates how the good we do truly comes back to us, perhaps not immediately, but profoundly. The closing scene, where the community rallies to support George, is a powerful depiction of “what goes around comes around” in action.

Building a better world, or as some might say, the kingdom of God, is often achieved through small and simple acts. Scripture reminds us, “by small and simple things are great things brought to pass.” We don’t need to perform grand, dramatic gestures to make a difference. It’s the daily acts of kindness, encouragement, and compassion that collectively create significant positive change. A word of encouragement, holding a door open, a random act of kindness, a reassuring smile, sharing beauty – these seemingly small gestures have a profound ripple effect.

Learning to See the Invisible: Empathy in Action

My father possessed a remarkable ability to see those in need whom others overlooked. How could so many people pass by the stranded motorist, yet my father, driving at highway speed on the opposite side of the road, noticed him instantly? How did he spot the faint wave of a man across the vast expanse of Flaming Gorge when I was only focused on my fishing line?

Let’s consider the concept of the visible and the invisible.

Have you ever felt invisible? Many of us have. In a crowd, it’s easy to feel unseen, especially when others seem to be the center of attention. Even in smaller communities, feelings of invisibility can creep in. It’s easy to feel like no one sees the real you – the vulnerable, insecure, and anxious you, the you who needs someone to believe in you, the person metaphorically stranded on the side of the road while life rushes by.

I worry that our constant engagement with cell phones can inadvertently make those around us invisible. While we aim to stay connected digitally, we risk shutting out the physical world and the people in it. We cannot recognize another’s need if we fail to truly see them. We cannot offer spontaneous service if our attention is fixed on a screen instead of the humanity surrounding us.

Ferris Bueller wisely advised, “Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.”

A Lifetime of Service: A Legacy of Love

The hymn “Because I Have Been Given Much” beautifully echoes these principles:

“Because I have been given much, I too must give; Because of thy great bounty, Lord, each day I live I shall divide my gifts from thee With ev’ry brother that I see Who has the need of help from me.

Because I have been sheltered, fed by thy good care, I cannot see another’s lack and I not share My glowing fire, my loaf of bread, My roof’s safe shelter overhead, That he too may be comforted.

Because I have been blessed by thy great love, dear Lord, I’ll share thy love again, according to thy word. I shall give love to those in need; I’ll show that love by word and deed: Thus shall my thanks be thanks indeed.”

Witnessing kindness and generosity in my own children has been one of my greatest joys as a parent. It reflects the very love that Christ extends to each of us.

Love – God’s love – is the essence of this principle. How do we bring others closer to this divine love? By sharing His love with our fellow human beings. We can do this in small, meaningful ways:

First, we must truly see – see those who are often invisible, those who need encouragement, upliftment, and healing.

Second, we must be willing to interrupt our plans, even momentarily, to offer help and kindness when opportunities arise.

Third, we must act with love as our motivation. The more love we give, the greater our capacity for love expands. The more love we share, the more love we will have to give.

I testify that the more love we give, the more love will, in some form, return to us.

Do a good turn daily. Pay it back. You reap what you sow. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. “For that which ye do send out shall return unto you again, and be restored.” Be a bucket filler. What goes around comes around.

I express my deepest love and gratitude for my parents, whose enduring example of service and love continues to guide my life.

My testimony is that our greatest work is to see the unseen, to lift up those who are downtrodden, and to share God’s love by loving our fellow human beings. In doing so, we have the opportunity to heal ourselves and draw closer to the perfect love of God. Of the power, depth, and beauty of His divine love, I offer my humble witness. In the name of Jesus Christ, amen.


Notes

  1. Dieter F. Uchtdorf, “First Presidency Message: A Word for the Hesitant Missionary,” Ensign, February 2013.

  2. See Luke 10:30–37.

  3. Mark 10:13.

  4. Mark 10:14; see also verse 15.

  5. See Matthew 9:18–33.

  6. Matthew 9:18–19.

  7. Matthew 9:32.

  8. Alma 41:14–15; emphasis added.

  9. See Ether 12:27.

  10. See Mosiah 2:24.

  11. Alma 41:15.

  12. Gordon B. Hinckley, One Bright Shining Hope: Messages for Women from Gordon B. Hinckley (Salt Lake City: Deseret Book, 2006), 24; quoted in Teachings of Presidents of the Church: Gordon B. Hinckley (Salt Lake City: The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, 2016), 191–92.

  13. John C. Maxwell, quoted on The John Maxwell Company Facebook page, facebook­.com/TheJohnMaxwellCompany/posts/1083460228372443.

  14. IMDB’s page for quotes for Ferris Bueller’s Day Off (1986), imdb.com/title/tt0091042/quotes.

  15. Because I Have Been Given Much,” Hymns, 2002, no. 219.

  16. Alma 41:15.

  17. After I had served my mission, my ­parents returned to full activity in the Church, and we were sealed together as a family shortly thereafter.

© Brigham Young University. All rights reserved.

See the complete list of abbreviations here

Kirt R. SavilleKirt R. Saville

Comments

No comments yet. Why don’t you start the discussion?

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *