“Fifty Shades of Grey,” the erotic romance novel by E.L. James, took the world by storm. The first book of the “Fifty Shades” trilogy, published in 2011, introduces readers to the complex relationship between college student Anastasia Steele and the enigmatic millionaire Christian Grey. But beneath the surface of steamy romance lies a controversial narrative that raises serious questions. The story centers around a BDSM (bondage/discipline, dominance/submission, and sadism/masochism) relationship between Christian and Anastasia, which has sparked debate about its portrayal of love and power dynamics.
Many critics and experts argue that Ana and Christian’s relationship transcends BDSM and ventures into the territory of abuse. A 2013 study by social scientist Amy E. Bonomi, drawing on the Center for Disease Control and Prevention’s standards for emotional abuse and sexual violence, revealed that nearly every interaction between Ana and Christian exhibited abusive traits, including stalking, intimidation, and isolation, according to the Huffington Post. Bonomi further concluded that Ana displayed common signs of an abused woman, such as constant feelings of threat or danger, persistent stress, and an altered sense of self.
Anastasia Steele and Christian Grey
When we first meet Ana, she is portrayed as lacking in personality, sexual experience, and self-esteem. Christian’s entrance into her life proves to be a destructive force. She loses control over her own life after their initial meeting. He presents her with a detailed contract that demands she surrender her body to him. The contract requires her to use birth control so that Christian doesn’t have to wear a condom, to work out four days a week, and to consume only foods from a list approved by him. Ana’s life becomes solely focused on pleasing him, with no consideration for her own feelings or desires.
While some may believe they would reject such a contract, this plot point reflects the unhealthy dynamics present in many relationships today. Ana’s discovery of Christian’s past abuse leads her to take on the responsibility of understanding him and his behavior.
This reflects a pattern seen in many young women who are drawn to the “lost cause” type—men with problems at home, struggles in school, or a general lack of direction. These women often believe they are uniquely capable of helping and fixing these men, which is not their job. You should not become your boyfriend’s personal psychologist because he has unresolved issues. This doesn’t diminish your care; it simply recognizes the importance of seeking professional help for personal problems outside the relationship. Christian brought his issues into the bedroom, and Ana’s attempts to help him in that context were bound to fail.
One of the biggest issues with “Fifty Shades of Grey” lies in its marketing. The film, depicting a latent abusive relationship, was released during Valentine’s Day weekend. This decision sends a disturbing message, suggesting that couples should watch this film together on their romantic date. The movie’s tagline, “Mr. Grey will see you now,” and the use of a Beyoncé song romanticize the film, diverting attention from its true nature.
The film’s advertisements don’t hint at the darker themes explored within “Fifty Shades of Grey.” By watching this movie, viewers are essentially supporting the glamorization of domestic violence. The casting of Jamie Dornan, a male model, as Christian further contributes to this deception. His appearance makes the film more appealing, masking the underlying issues.
In conclusion, “Fifty Shades of Grey” sparked a cultural phenomenon, but it’s crucial to critically examine its portrayal of relationships. The film’s romanticized depiction of abuse can be harmful, especially for young audiences. By understanding the underlying issues, viewers can engage with the story more responsibly and challenge the normalization of unhealthy relationship dynamics. Great looking men can be monsters too. Don’t be fooled.
