When someone asks, “What Is A Rom Com?” what images spring to mind? Perhaps it’s Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks’s iconic meeting atop the Empire State Building. Maybe John Cusack holding a boombox aloft comes to mind. Or even Steve Carell’s hilarious “Kelly Clarkson!” outburst during his chest waxing scene in The 40-Year-Old Virgin. The answer, as the name suggests, lies in a blend of romance and comedy. While both elements present unique challenges, nailing the comedic aspects can often feel like the most daunting.
Many believe that you need to be a comedian to write a funny scene. However, writing comedy is more than just delivering punchlines. Many tools can be used to help develop comedic talents.
Jane Austen, a master of romantic comedies, often concluded her novels with weddings or heartfelt proposals. Yet, she herself never married. Her works are considered comedies of manners, but that doesn’t mean she had stand-up routines at pubs.
This portrait depicts Jane Austen, the celebrated author of romantic comedies.
Know Your Comedic Tone
The most important rule of comedy is that humor is subjective. You won’t be able to get everyone to laugh. Avoid trying to squeeze every style of comedy into your book. Think about what makes you laugh. Do you like dry and witty humor? Something a little over the top? Readers expect something on the lighter side. Darker humor can be done. For example, Jesse Q. Sutanto’s Dial A for Aunties starts with the heroine accidentally killing her blind date.
Once you know your comedic strengths, focus on sharpening them. Reading your work aloud can help. If you’re brave, you can read it in front of other people. Pay attention to when people laugh unexpectedly and decipher why those moments worked.
Know Your Genre (And Its Tropes)
What is a rom-com? A rom-com needs three things: romance, comedy, and conflict. However, there are two asterisks attached to the last one. The conflict needs to be the driving force behind a romantic relationship that’s the central plot of the story. Readers pick up a rom-com to see how two (or more!) people end up together.
Conflict needs to include moments of comedic tension. The tension can be sexy and steamy, but it needs to be funny at times. This is where the tropes come in.
A romantic trope is a theme, character, or plot device that’s been used so often that it’s easily recognizable in the genre. The reasons tropes are used over and over again is because they work. Friends-to-lovers, opposites attract, and forced proximity all have natural conflict baked into them. In a rom-com, this is where you start mining for comedic gold.
The First Son of the United States is forced into a fake friendship with his nemesis, the Prince of Wales … and wacky hijinks ensue in “Red, White & Royal Blue.”
Let’s revisit our heroine at the creepy old mansion. What if she has to share a room with the woman of her dreams for the night… and there’s only one bed? What could possibly go wrong? Hopefully everything.
Pain is Funny (Especially When It’s Not Your Own)
As comedy legend Mel Brooks once said, “Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.” Other people’s misfortune can be funny because it didn’t happen to us. Don’t be afraid to make your characters squirm.
A little bit of catastrophe lends itself well to the meet-cute trope. Can your two leads bump into each other on a crowded subway car and have it set off a chain of romantic events that sustains an entire novel? Sure. But is it memorable? Is it funny? What if one of the leads was just laid off from her job, and her dress gets stuck in the train door, ripping the back half open? Not only does this put the character in a vulnerable position, upping the dramatic tension, but it allows us to sympathize with her. We’ve all had embarrassing moments. When we laugh at something like this, it’s because we understand the feeling, and we’re relieved not to be the one experiencing it. Don’t be too cruel to your characters. Give your characters plenty of triumphs as well.
That’s What He / She / They Said
Good banter is one of the backbones of romantic comedies. Readers expect their romantic leads to be able to exchange snappy one-liners and clever retorts at a pace that’s rarely matched in real life. It should feel effortless. If you have a good sense of comedic timing, you have an advantage. If you don’t, do some research. Read and watch as many rom-coms as you want. If you immerse yourself in the genre and pay attention to the dialogue, you’ll start to develop an ear for the rhythms and cadences that make a scene snap. Remember that more concise is usually better.
How the characters are behaving is just as important as what they’re saying. As a general rule, you never want to let your characters get too mean. Banter is supposed to be fun and flirty. Think good-hearted teasing, not cold-blooded torture. While their words can still have bite, body language, action, or internal dialogue can help convey the true playfulness of the situation.
The Rule of Three
The rule of three is a storytelling principle that suggests a collection of things—words, ideas, sentences—are more effective and memorable when grouped together in threes. The human brain latches onto something it recognizes—a pattern—and uses that to process the information it’s being given.
In comedy, the rule of three can be manipulated in a way that will almost always ensure you a laugh. Once the pattern is established with your first two things, the third can be subverted, therefore catching your audience by surprise.
Let’s say we have a romantic protagonist who’s anxious about their first date. While sitting in the restaurant parking lot, the following monologue plays in their head:
What if we have nothing in common? What if I get food stuck in my teeth? What if I develop a sudden shellfish allergy, my date falls in love with the cute EMT, and two years from now, when they feel obligated to invite me to their wedding, I find myself spending hundreds of dollars on a rice cooker for someone I never even made it to the dessert course with?
The third sentence heightens their anxiety to an absurd level we don’t expect, and it breaks the shorter pattern of the first two sentences.
Writing comedy doesn’t have to be intimidating. Find what tips, tricks, and tropes work best for you and have fun with it. Don’t worry too much about being funny. Your readers are usually the ones who will decide that for you.
